It was full of cliches, with fairytale appearing before the program had even begun. However, it was the claims of Gretna chairman Brooks Mileson and manager Rowan Alexander I found most amusing.
According to Mileson, his money has had nothing to do with their success and the players they have been able to attract. Instead, it is all down to Alexander. Sadly the person doing the documentary did not pick up on this, quite frankly, ludicrous claim, which is a shame.
From what Mileson says, we are to believe that the likes of James Grady and Chris Innes, guys who could easily do a job for a first division side, signed for Gretna because of Rowan Alexander and his vision. May I ask why these players were not signed by Gretna before Mileson's arrival? Why did Alexander not sign them for Queen of the South when he was manager there? Why in Mileson's first year at Gretna, 2003/04, did they finish miles off promotion and have fans calling for the manager's head if he is so amazing?
You have to wonder what goes through the heads of Grady if they aren't signing for the money. Alexander had an unremarkable career as a player, and until Mileson's second season an unremarkable career as a manager. However, we're supposed to believe he is why the signed for Gretna.
This is of course utter nonsense, and Mileson contradicted himself soon after when he said football was a hobby he puts money into, and without him the club was unsustainable. But I thought Gretna weren't paying high wages, it was all down to Alexander?
Mileson has in the past tried to go one further, claiming that Gretna were just paying the wages they paid when in the Ryman's League. Why weren't they signing the likes of David Bingham when they were playing in England then?
Then there is Alexander himself. Most of what he said was fairly unremarkable, however there were two claims that I found amusing. Apparently after leaving Queen of the South (no explanation for his departure there was given), he was going to some Gretna games and could see the vision they had. Whilst playing in the Ryman's league. Good grief, I need to get him to pick my lottery numbers!
However, the finest point was when Alexander said he wrote to Gretna asking that if the manager's job came up, he'd like to be considered. Sadly there were no details given on how long after this he was appointed, or how Gretna's previous manager left. However, to me that sounds like a good reason for Gretna's former manager (whoever he was) to be preparing some kind of unfair dismissal case.
I have nothing against Mileson, and his commitment to Gretna's involvment in the community should be applauded (even if it is nicking potential fans from Stranraer and Queen of the South). I'm probably even a little jealous of the money. However, why doesn't he just admit it's down to the money rather than the vision of some average, unremarkable manager?
Sadly, the Scottish media seem willing to accept everything Gretna say at face value, instead of probing it. They've spent the last two years sucking up to them and talking about how wonderful they are. The last club they did that to were Livingston, who are now on the way down with sod all fans.
The next few days will be even more cliche ridden, and I will be shocked if the phrase "Will the last person out of Gretna please turn out the lights?" isn't mentioned on TV at least once.